How to politely ask 'Where are you from?'

Seattle   Tue Aug 05, 2008 8:49 pm GMT
Well, it seems like whenever someone asks me where I'm from, the conversation soon turns to the weather. I guess it's because we have the most amazing, bizarre, and unique climate. I was just in Boston a week ago, and about 3 different people asked me if I came to Boston to dry off!?! Everyone seemed to be under the mistaken impression that it actually rains a lot in Seattle during the summer. Last month it drizzled on 3 days out of the 31 days, totalling 0.48 inches of rain. Hardly a deluge--Boston itself got 6 times as much rainfall. In fact we get less rain than even places like Phoenix in July--they get about an inch.
Uriel   Wed Aug 06, 2008 1:10 am GMT
<< wonder if the British doctor who treated Uriel in England presented her with a bill for her treatment seing that she is not a UK resident>>

Hell no, he didn't. ER visits in the UK apparently are free to all, as many a tourist has found out. Any medical care beyond emergency, however, IS billed to foreigners. Read an article by an American whose wife had had a stroke in London due to a blood clot that had formed on the long flight over, and he went into great detail about the payment scale and other particulars about his wife's stay in two English hospitals (one public, one private), her continued care in New York, and some interesting comparisons between the two experiences. Wish I had the link, but it came off of one of Matt Frei's blogs on the BBC news and I read it while (not) working one day....
Uriel   Wed Aug 06, 2008 1:28 am GMT
<<"What's Nava-JOE mean?" Wrong state, but you get the idea... >>

While most of the Navajo nation's land is in Arizona, some of the reservation is in NM, too, so we have them as well. Go up to Gallup some time -- it's all Indian, and I imagine many of them are Navajo.



<<"Never ask a man where he's from. If he's from Texas, he'll tell you; and if not, why embarrass him?" --Texas saying >>

How about, "You're not from Texas/ But Texas loves you anyway!" -- Lyle Lovett


<<You should be a comedian/comedienne, Uriel. Did he really say this? Aargh!>>

Hey. Ya gotta cut him some slack -- I don't even think he was natively British. His accent was definitely from somewhere else, maybe SW Asia. (I didn't ask -- again, stomach pain!) So, given that I've had other Americans give me blank looks about my state, I would hardly expect a stranger from the other side of the world to be all up on another country's internal geography!


<<I can't imagine getting offended by the question of where I'm from, except that I do get annoyed when someone asks what town and then I tell them and they don't know where it is so they want a detailed description. They need to look it up on a map if they are that curious. >>

Really? That doesn't bother me a bit. I don't think most people outside of the tristate area (that would be NM, Texas, and Chihuahua, in my case) would have the foggiest notion of where my town is, so I'm happy to tell them (southern end of the state, on the Rio Grande, about 40 minutes from El Paso, and an hour from the Mexican border -- depending on traffic). By the time they find themselves near a map, they're not likely to remember the name well enough to look it up, so why not give them a helping hand? They're only asking so that they can try to visualize it. Which means they're making the effort. If someone told me they were from Bristol or Nice I would be asking the same thing, trying to get a mental fix on it.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 1:44 am GMT
"Go up to Gallup some time -- it's all Indian, and I imagine many of them are Navajo."

I haven't been there for awhile, but I think it was like that when I was a child too. I don't know much about tribal groups except in Arizona. I've been out to one of the reservations to see patients there (a few years ago). Diabetes is a big problem.
Uriel   Wed Aug 06, 2008 2:04 am GMT
Diabetes seems to be big in both Native and Hispanic populations. There's lots of it in NM.

If I recall correctly, Arizona has such tribes as the Navajo, Hopi, Pima, Papago, and Zuni, right? (Sorry I can't type the tilde over the n in Zuni!) NM has Navajos, Pueblo, and Apaches (Mescalero Apache -- I think you guys have Chiricahua Apaches, but I could be wrong).
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 2:32 am GMT
The Tohono O’odham Nation is the Papago group. The University of Arizona offers a lot of interesting languages for anyone interested in Native American languages and some other "exotics". It's too bad I never see these languages discussed on the Languages forum (except Navajo/Navaho) sometimes. I guess they aren't as interesting to most people as some of the smaller languages in Europe. They interest me, though.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 2:38 am GMT
Uriel   Wed Aug 06, 2008 2:58 am GMT
It's probably not that they aren't interesting, but that they are a little obscure to most people, especially outside of the Americas. I have heard a few snatches of Navajo from a coworker who was born and raised on the reservation, and it was a very different sounding language -- lots of strange consonants. Some of her accounts of tribal customs -- especially as they have been incorporated into modern life -- were fascinating as well.

What I thought was interesting about native languages when I took anthro classes was how two or more tribes might have been widely separated geographically -- hundreds or thousands of miles apart -- and might live totally different lifestyles -- nomadic hunters vs settled agriculturalists -- and yet their linguistic background might point to a common cultural and geographical origin long ago, from which they had simply migrated apart.
Uriel   Wed Aug 06, 2008 5:37 am GMT
Now, see? -- All our Guest had to do was mention Arizona and we're off on a whole conversation. That's where "So where are you from?" can get you!
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 5:57 am GMT
I don't like having long-winded conversations about pointless topics with strangers. Sorry.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 6:02 am GMT
<<I don't like having long-winded conversations about pointless topics with strangers. Sorry.>>

Stick in the mud. I've had some great conversations and been introduced to some good friends of mine while having "long-winded conversations about pointless topics.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 7:33 am GMT
<<Stick in the mud. I've had some great conversations and been introduced to some good friends of mine while having "long-winded conversations about pointless topics.>>

Good for you but there are a lot of people of my ilk so you shouldn't be surprised that someone doesn't want to talk about it.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 7:38 am GMT
You come from a very bad ilk.
Guest   Wed Aug 06, 2008 8:32 am GMT
One reason some Americans might not like the question is because there is no real answer. I despise it because I've lived in a dozen cities in many states, and over 10 years overseas. I could make a case for at least 5 places as a hometown. So, I just pick a random place when asked or don't answer at all. It's pointless.

One way to be polite is not to ask; let them volunteer the information.
George   Wed Aug 06, 2008 9:10 am GMT
<<I don't think Americans would mind paying for a bandage and I doubt they are coming in droves to take advantage of the NHS. We have pretty good healthcare here. I haven't seen any better anywhere in the world where I've travelled or worked. We also give "free care" to people in the emergency department. We also write off bills at times. You have to know how it works, to get this, but it happens.>>

Accident and Emergency care in the US is not really free. My friend broke her leg skiing and landed herself with a few extra expenses by going to the 'wrong' hospital. She had insurance, but whoever pulled her off the mountain didn't take her to the hospital her insurance company recommended, so she had to pay the lot.

What is required is that they treat you. Obviously they are not going to leave you bleeding in the waiting room because your credit record is too low. But paying for it later can leave you in financial trouble.

The level of care provided in the US is generally very good. Comparisons with the NHS are interesting, just because of the difference in philosophy. In Britain there are limited resources so if a condition is non-emergency there can often be a wait for treatment. In America there are lawsuits, so if something could get worse they'll make sure it's dealt with and to hell with the bill.

During my time in the US I noticed a genuine change in public opinion. During Bush's second election campaign any mention of healthcare came with a patriotic nod to the value of a private system. Now, there seems a change towards the possibility of a nationalised system.

My very elementary knowledge of economics makes it hard for me to understand the value of private insurance. For me, the way insurance works is lots of people pay a little to cover the small chance that they will have a large bill, so the more people that are in on the system the better, and I think healthcare is something everybody needs. That is, this is one case where the free market is not best.

For me, the real problem in the US is the inefficiency of insurance companies. This acts to inflate the cost of healthcare. One visit to a specialist in US with some treatment would leave me with $70 to pay even after my insurance had paid the first 80%. I was once ill in France, and a trip to the doctor and a prescription cost in total just €20.